“Orgasms? From my butt?”
You bet!!
It’s 2023 and butt stuff is finally getting the buzz it deserves. It’s a whole other route to pleasure for folks of all ages, genders, and sexualities.
While this booty play revolution has made anal sex easier to talk about openly, there’s still plenty of misinformation, negative stigma, and stories of unfortunate first-time experiments which prevent folks from tantalizing their tushies.
Every body has a butt!
Founder and CEO of b-Vibe, Alicia Sinclair, said it best:
“Sensations and experiences that feel good to you have nothing to do with your sexual orientation or gender. It’s kind of like how the food that you enjoy is a totally different question than who you want to have dinner with.”
Regardless of your gender or sexual orientation, anyone can find powerful pleasure from anal stimulation.
Practice makes pleasure
A finger, toy, or penis might feel unfamiliar the first time you put it in there. Starting solo is the most comfy way to get started and make sure your booty – with its sensitive tissues and powerful muscles – is comfortable and relaxed.
Solo anal play, just like with partners, doesn’t even require penetration! Any sort of self-stimulation of your anus, prostate, or rectum (with their countless nerve endings and pleasure processors, both inside your body and out) counts as anal play.
As giver and receiver, you’ll become familiar you with the sensations and better able to communicate what feels good to a partner.
How to get started
Set the mood with lighting, candles, and music. Set the stage with care and take your time. The sphincter muscles you’re targeting are connected to the Vagus nerve, which controls automatic body functions like digestion, heart rate, and reflexes (ie, coughing, sneezing, swallowing).
Slow down your breathing, relax: Your Vagus nerve will respond in kind, and you might feel the relaxation spread to your rectum. You might even find you can feel your anus squeeze on the inhale and relax on the exhale. (If not, don’t worry: practice makes pleasure!) This is the best way to make anal penetration easier: deep, slow breathing.
All The LUBE
Lube your fingers and lightly massage the outside of your anus. Then add more pressure. Experiment with just one spot, or trace circles around the entire opening. Try stroking, pulsing, circular motions, and walking your fingers around the opening. Find the sweet spots and most enjoyable motions for you!
If you decide you’re ready for penetration, go slow and remember to focus on what feels good. Back off if you find a spot or motion that doesn’t feel great. It’s not a race! Different people have different experiences (imagine that!) and knowing how your own body works will make it a thousand times easier if you want to do this with someone else.
Supplies to have on hand
Folks often want to jump straight to enemas. They’re a great option for a deep clean, an hour or two before anal play. You don’t need a whole lot of water: You’re just rinsing out the last six to eight inches of your rectum. Only use water you’d drink – if you filter your tap water, for instance, use that. Cold water causes cramps, and hot water irritates sensitive tissues: make sure you’ve got a moderate, warm temperature in the enema. Any more than a few cups of water will stimulate your digestive system and make a mess for sure.
Honestly, though, most folks get plenty clean if they go to the bathroom up to an hour before anal play. Empty your bowels, wash your butt with regular soap and warm water, or use unscented, hypoallergenic wipes.
Put down a towel to protect your bedsheets from lube and bodily fluids. You are playing where fecal matter lives, after all: It’s totally natural and absolutely nothing to be ashamed of if a little escapes. It’s not a disaster and it doesn’t have to be a hassle – keep calm, clean up, and move forward, whether that’s a shower and trying something new once you get back to bed, or ending the session until the mood strikes again. You get to decide what’s best for you.
Using gloves is a good way to stay clean, especially when giving an anal massage. You can get them at the drugstore, though the black gloves tattoo artists use are thinner, and you may find them a sexier aesthetic. Latex gloves are often less expensive, but check with yourself and any partners for latex allergies. Nitrile gloves work great – just make sure they fit nice ‘n tight, wrinkles will irritate the anus.
In conclusion
When it comes to anal play, do what works and feels best for your body. It’s not a race! The Cats at the Cat are here to help answer any questions you may have, and we have plenty of anal-safe toys and lubes to bring with you on your anal adventure!
